Listen up all of my wonderful wonderful wonderful subbies. I pulled out my LAPTOP at 02:16 for this… My actual laptop. Not my iPhone and not the iPad. It isn’t even my old Toshiba… I pulled out the mean machine (A.K.A. The beautiful shiny new plum colored HP I received for grad back in June) for this very blog post.

THE NEXT PARAGRAPH IS A BORING BUT IMPORTANT RANT:

I have here a few things I think everyone should know about love but first… I’m sitting here pounding the keys of my laptop mercilessly, and thinking about how I’m definitely at a weird age. Half of the adults in my life take me seriously, and the other half of adults in my life wish I would quit growing up. It’s true. I’m in transition. The thing is I’m mentally around the age of thirty running around in an 18 year old’s body and DYING for someone to just look at me and say, “You know what… I get it. You’re just trying your best and observing everything as you go and making your own mistakes and that is really really rad. Just be careful and hug your loved ones tight.” BUT NO ONE IS BECAUSE THIS IS LIFE AND PEOPLE ASSUME THAT OTHER PEOPLE ARE CONSTANTLY TOLD THE THINGS THEY NEED TO HEAR AND IT’S JUST NOT TRUE. I’m making a habit of just saying things that come to mind about other people because if we get lazy and fall into the mind set that “oh that person has probably been told they are lovely before” we will all get lazy and no one will EVER know how great they are.

THAT BEING SAID… I am 18 going on 19 and I feel like I know more about love and life than some people ever will for all of their years. So lets please take a minute, sit back, and just listen to what the Internet Queen has to say shall we? Before we get into the “she’s too young to understand anything at all” mind set.

1.) Even your average Einstein can be plain dumb with their heart.

“No shocker there Nealie.” Yeah, I get it… Most love does make people uncharacteristically dumb. Lately though I’ve watched people I care very much about fall in and out of love with some real bang up human beings. Some of the smartest people I know curl up with Ben & Jerry’s on a regular basis due to a new Earth shattering fracture to the all important blood-pumping-thought-stupifying heart. I had to look at my best friend the other day and say, “You, my love, are a very smart girl. However, you are very dumb with that heart of yours.” Because it is late and my brain is absolutely fried from exhaustion I am going to very hautily declare my absolute correctness in saying that this goes for A LOT OF PEOPLE. (Sass is at a record high of 52 out of 10 tonight on NBN…)

2.) Young adults are the #1 worst at defining relationships.

This pertains to all of my 18 to 26 year old following… WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?!?!?! Get it together and tell the girl you want her if you want her and leave her alone if you don’t! Tell the guy that you can’t stop thinking about him! Quit being ridiculous and getting caught up in the “he-said-she-said-gotta-play-it-cool” mentality!!! I am guilty. However, in the same respect that I am trying to tell other people in general what is actually on my mind about them – I am also trying to get over myself long enough to get over this STUPID “Play it Cool” thing that some moron decided was cute. SERIOUSLY THOUGH… I wish every time I asked a friend of mine if they were dating someone the answer wasn’t, “Oh IDK we’re kind of talking, but it’s like whatevs and we like might maybe totally date soon.”

3.) The love experts are not experts and absolutely no one can help you with whomever it is that you decide to dote upon.

You are on your own! That’s right… You heard it here first folks… You are plain out of luck. Quit asking your friends and your mom and all of Facebook and everyone you know and the friendly barista what you should do about your love life. Why? Simply because there is no manual for all the different people types (no matter what the social scientists tell you) that you can decide to spend your feelings on. This is all really case by case, and people react diferently to all different things and you react differently to all the types of people you know because you are your own unique person so there isn’t anyone in the world who can look you in the eye and honestly tell you what to do next with someone you are head over heels for. I’m sorry, and I wish it was different and that I could tell you differently, but I can’t.

There are a lot of things that I haven’t discussed here on NBN for the sake of other people’s privacy and the privacy of my own family, but you all know I have hinted at my less than stellar love life history. (As my parents read this I can feel their cringe in my bones… Thanks for letting me make my own mistakes anyway because that made me a more solid human being.) The point is that it has all made for a GREAT GREAT GREAT life lesson, and I honestly wouldn’t have it any other way. I would redo it all again if it meant that I could be sitting in my bed at 02:56 telling you this… The most important thing you all should know… The big number four.

4.) You’re going to have to figure it out.

Love comes in all different colors is the best way I can put it. Love comes in toxic black, love comes in violent purples, love comes in reckless yellow, love comes in dreary blues, love comes in a young carefree pink, love comes in blow-your-mind-unconditional-can’t-eat-can’t-sleep-without-you red. You just have to figure out what your love is. It’s okay not to know because hind sight will always be 2020. You don’t really know what you have on your plate until all of a sudden you know what you don’t have. You might think your love life is perfect and you have it all when all of a sudden you get left high and dry. Kind of like how when you’re five you think the world is perfect, and all of a sudden you’re 18 and all you can read about online is wars and global warming and what reality TV star did what and gas prices in flux…

I don’t know who was supposed to read this today, but I do know it was put on my heart to write it… Heck maybe I wrote it for myself.

Just know you’re going to have to figure it out on your own.

Don’t be discouraged.

Always put your happy first.

Never run out of time for the little things you adore.

Always make time for your family.

Breathe.

Take it all in.

Lastly, and most importantly (in my opinion) know that I believe in you while you’re figuring it all out.

XOXO

NBNealie