Hey hey hey.

Listen up everyone.
I’m such a mess all the time. ALL OF THE TIME.
Some days I almost run out of gas throw two dollars in the tank and jet. Just yesterday I left my flash drive in the library with all my assignments on it and I had to redo them at 1 a.m. after work. I’m constantly double parked and full of too much caffeine. I listen to music way too loud at all times and I feel an extreme amount of compassion for a lot of people.

Living the dream and actively pursuing what I’ve been working towards for the past 18 years has become increasingly stressful.
This morning I rolled my windows down in the 40 degree weather and blasted my music so I wouldn’t fall asleep while I drove dutifully to my 8 a.m. It’s not a glamorous thing to do. It’s a knock down drag out sanguinary (See the dramatic linguistics?) pursuit.

That’s the thing! People think you just go out and do it with no blood sweat and tears up until they’re also simultaneously crying, typing, screaming, eating, and wishing they could watch Gossip Girl or go out.

I sure thought that. I’m a big picture thinker generally. So it never occurred to me that I would be combatting serious exhaustion on my way to an 8 a.m. class (and worrying about the safety of all drivers near me).

—–Cont. After a Short Library Nap—–

After class I slept in the library a little bit so I wouldn’t annihilate everyone with my car. Anyway.

Where I was going with was that IT DOESN’T MEAN I’M NOT REALLY HAPPY AND IT DOESN’T MEAN I’M NOT HAVING THE TIME OF MY LIFE. So yeah. I freak out. I swear a lot to my textbooks. I don’t sleep. But whatever.
I hope that’s your attitude about your dreams too!

XOXO,
NBNealie